All Jokes - Alphabetically
On the Job
You Might Teach At Middle School If...
- You can converse in middle schoolese.
- You believe the staff room should be equipped with Valium
- You stand on your front porch instructing the neighbor children
- You want to slap the next person who says, "Must be
nice to only work 8 - 3 and have your summers free."
- You refer to adults as "boys and girls."
- You encourage your spouse by telling them they are a "good
- You believe chocolate
is a major food group.
- You can tell it's a full moon without ever looking outside.
- You believe "extremely
annoying" should have its own box on the report card.
- When you are out in public you snap your fingers at kids
who are misbehaving.
- You give your spouse "the look" when they "misbehave."
- You have no life from August through June.
- Putting all "A"s on the report card would be so much easier.
- You think people should be required to get a government permit
before being allowed to reproduce, earned by having worked in
a middle school for 5 years.
- You encourage a parent to check into homeschooling.
- You don't want children of your own because there isn't a
can hear that wouldn't elevate your blood pressure.
- You believe in the spraying of Prozac
in school ventilation systems.
- You think that IV caffeine should be available in staff rooms.
- Meeting a child's parent instantly answers: "Why is this kid like that?"