Milpitas Mom's Favorite Jokes

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Warnings & Instructions

On a package of bread-pudding mix
Product will be hot after heating.

On the bottom of a container of prepared (and delicate) tiramisu
Do not turn upside down.

Among the instructions with an iron
Do not iron clothes on body.

On a bottle of children's cough syrup
Do not drive car or operate machinery.

On the bottle of an over-the-counter sleep aid
Warning: May cause drowsiness.

With a kitchen knife
Warning: Keep out of children.

With a string of Christmas lights
For indoor or outdoor use only.

On a package of peanuts
Warning: Contains nuts.

On another package of peanuts
Instructions: Open packet, eat nuts.

In some chain saw instructions
Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands.

Among instructions for a glue that required the combining of a powder and a liquid catalyst
Stir 20 seconds. Use a watch.